i have been thinking every time i am stuck in an endurance battle - as long as i hold on tight, be stronger than i was, i would get through it, and things would then get better.
it’s been years.
i had gotten through tons of battles.
but the end of a battle is almost never a happily ever after
once you see the mirage, a new wave comes engulfing all of you
it is like sailing in an ocean, with infinite horizon, that the waves never cede
so i cannot drain myself out in the battle, wishfully thinking that the shore is only a few more paddles away
what all those inspirational quotes never teach us is that in life, you get to different check points, but never an end
it is all survival-driven, and there’s only going to be more problems.
instead of trying to have a positive attitude and all that, i need to live knowing they are coming, having the courage to face them, and a heart big enough to live with them come and go.